What Was I Thinking? 58 Bad Boyfriend Stories

by Liz Dubelman

““What Was I Thinking?” offers a humorous and heartfelt look at the questionable choices we make in love. With 58 essays full of cringe-worthy moments and self-deprecating humor, this anthology will make you laugh, wince, and feel a little better about your own romantic missteps.”

— Claire Hargrove author of Love, Lies, and Leftovers and The Single Girl’s Survival Guide

What Was I Thinking? is a collection of personal essays written by women describing that moment in a relationship when, no matter how much you think it should work or want it to work or need it to work, it becomes clear to you that it’s not going to work. It can be anything—a word used incorrectly, an insensitive comment, a glimpse of bad personal hygiene or moral weakness or breathtaking selfishness, or just an ugly sweater. In any case, the genie of disillusionment bursts out of the bottle, and there’s no putting it back in. Which is to say, this is not necessarily the moment of the actual breakup. Rather, these stories describe the instant when logic, common sense, and simple self-respect triumph over the human need to be loved—or, at least, the need to be in a relationship. The relationship may not last beyond lunch, or it may linger for weeks or even longer. But inside, you know: He’s going to be an ex. Using the Internet as our global watercooler, we put the word out through Craigslist, Facebook, and MySpace. We contacted writing programs and talked it up at cocktail parties. We found that our community was the size of the world—and that everyone had a story. And then another interesting thing happened. The stories that started coming in were not aren’t-guys-stupid? stories or are-men-necessary? stories that might conclude, however wistfully, with “No, they’re not.” Rather, they were stories about women looking back at themselves—poignantly, humorously, maybe sometimes in disbelief—to see how and why they got involved with the guy in the awful sweater in the first place.

Genres:: Memoir, Humor, Relationships

Accolades

““What Was I Thinking?” offers a humorous and heartfelt look at the questionable choices we make in love. With 58 essays full of cringe-worthy moments and self-deprecating humor, this anthology will make you laugh, wince, and feel a little better about your own romantic missteps.”

— Claire Hargrove , author of Love, Lies, and Leftovers and The Single Girl’s Survival Guide
“From bad boys to baffling breakups, What Was I Thinking? is a collection of stories that perfectly captures the highs, lows, and absurdities of modern relationships. These witty and insightful essays remind us that even the worst mistakes can become the best stories.”

— Marcus Alcott , author of The Ex Files: What We Can Learn From Love Lost and Dating Disasters: A Memoir
“Liz Dubelman’s What Was I Thinking? brings together 58 tales of romantic misadventures that are as cringe-worthy as they are funny. Perfect for anyone who’s ever looked back and wondered, “What was I thinking?” This anthology is a celebration of love, laughter, and lessons learned.”

— Tasha Elwood , author of Heartbreaks and Hilarities and Swipe Right, Crash Left: Adventures in Modern Dating

Selected Reviews

Cringe-Worthy Yet Cathartic

“What Was I Thinking?" delivers exactly what its title promises - a cringe-worthy yet cathartic collection of dating disasters that will make you feel infinitely better about your own romantic mishaps. Through 58 brutally honest accounts, women bare their souls about the red flags they ignored, the warning signs they dismissed, and the moments that...”

— Percy Smith, The New Jersey Times

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Dark Bill by Amy Turner

Excerpt from What Was I Thinking? 58 Bad Boyfriend Stories

In a fit of first-month relationship giddiness he jumps out of bed one morning and goes to Gelson’s for post-hump croissants. I am trying to be bon vivant cool, as if I always start my Tuesdays at nine with pastry, when in fact—unless I’ve gone to the gym and they are made out of a complete protein spelt flour—I run...

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